Archive for the ‘Washington Wizards’ Category
It’s like this, fool me once, shame on you, fool me — you can’t get fooled again. Also, in another universe, a white ex-Duke player (oxymoron..) and a reality show person are somehow “relevant” (perhaps I’m making it worse by dabbing into it as well, HOWEVA, it led me to combine the two to make a post)
You see, far too often in the lives of obscure NBA players are they succumbed to fates unkind to their personal relationships with members of the opposite sex. Here at the Unrelatedness, I’ll provide some key pointers for those that have no “charm” or aren’t “smooth” when it comes to the seedy world of dating…
On Dating Women in the Media…
DON’T go out with beat reporters, for you’ll be subjected to the following question:
- “how did you feel about your performance?”
- “was it something I did to disrupt your confidence or it just wasn’t your night?”
- “what will you do in the second half to break the defense a little more”
DO go out with these “journalists/anchorwomen” (mini-NSFW!)
On Dating Women in the public office…
DON’T go out with this lady that says she’s crazier than Lorena Bobbitt
DO go out with Madeline Albright, HOTTT!
On Dating Women that looks like a hooker but really isn’t…
DON’T do it, she’s a cop
DO…… NOT DO IT ANDRAY! Big mistake!
Since we’re all waiting for Draft day to have something more to chatter about, here is today’s OSM: pics:
there’s nothing like a crotch shot of a possible #1 pick Kevin Durant, NOTHING
from the lovely Yahoo captions people… I didn’t know Ye Li is white… and what is ‘teenage sweetheart’ anyways? is Ye still a teenager?? or… they went out since their were teenagers… yeah, that’s probably it… well, there goes my fun times…
Hey kid, get your hands off Blue Man’s blue balls!
*dut.. dut.. dut.. dut dududududududduddudud*
The Following Takes Place Between 9:34:08pm and 9:34:11pm
Washington D.C. — Verizon Center
Jack Bauer: Mr. President, I strongly oppose of this action! I’ve done some crazy torturing in my time, but this is sick!
President Arenas: Jack… it’s come to this, there is no other choice, it must be done, for the good for the country.
Chloe O’Brien: I… I can’t watch…
(Michael Ruffin enters into frame with an almost jovial expression)
Michael Ruffin: Hey hey folks! What’s the haps? Yeah, sorry about that dumb move I did. Won’t ever happen again— Umm.. why is the cast of 300 here…?
Michael Ruffin: Wwaait a tic, these half naked muscled men aren’t from 300, they’re…
Please, I’m sorry! It was an innocent mistake I swear! You can’t do this to me!
Arenas: Shhh, Mike.. shh. It’s going to be okay… just go to the happy place…
*bionk bomp bionk bomp bionk bomp*
[Uh.. sincere apologies for that disturbing one.. my mind goes to weird places--TheHype]
Previously on Previously Series:
Are You Smarter Than Chris Wilcox – guest starring Chris Wilcox
Entourage – guest starring Michael Redd
The Office – guest starring Yao
24 – guest starring Gilbert Arenas
Jeopardy – (no NBA players were present, but Ken Jennings is high most of the time)
So I thought I could’ve held out for another couple of days seeing that my blogging brain was taking a breather with studyin/papers and whatnot (ESPECIALLY the whatnot) but I succumbed to the inevitable holler of ye NBA bloggin (AT 4AM TOO!!).
So hells yeah, I’m the latest recruit into the Legion of NBA FanHaus Bloggers/CrimeFighters where I’ll hopefully, finally, learn the goodness that is spellcheck—oh, that and actually posting things that reaches (by my estimations) at least 9 other people that likes ‘toons.
That’s the biggie thing of the day/week, hopefully y’all come by and check out my shnits over there. But don’t worry happy campers, The Unrelatedess ain’t going nowhere (that’s a fact, I specifically signed a document with this fella called Lucifer) because damnit I paid for the domain name so I’ll get my money’s worth!
Alright, so, we all saw it by now. I’m not going to link to it because, well, I’m sure it’s pretty much the most seen thing for the past day. First off, I hope Shaun Livingston makes the best of recoveries and secondly wish that no one else ever goes through that. But well, we see a common denominator of late… one that I linked to the other day (Jake helped me connect the dots)… so Gatorade? Let’s just pull those ads out of the running for a while shall we?
Hopefully the Bog’s devout DC followers finds these acceptable. I do wish the’d wear it and go to a local Subways, all at once just to see what their reactions would be like.
Don’t do it for me… do it for… the fresh tomatoes!!
Like the title says, I’m doing a bit of recyclin’. This was done a while back, but I didn’t know it was a Nostradamus sort of connection between a game this afternoon and tonight’s Hollywood
Self-Fatulation Academy Awards
oh ps: watching the Bulls-Piston game and saw a very funny D-Wade Gatorade ad. Sigh, too bad.. you know.. he’s pretty much done for the year.. but it was mad funny tho “do it again! do it again!”
..because this just won’t write itself..
So K.O.be only got half of his 81 bananas on the anniversary of his record performance last night, oh yeah, the game? they won. To some, namely TJ Simers of LATimes, a high scoring Bryant player is what’s good for the eyes, not the “distributing to open players” and “takeover when necessary” type of player:
It seems as if it would be more exciting if the greatest scorer in the game remained the greatest scorer in the game from start to finish, but everyone now seems to be in agreement the Lakers can’t win playing that way. If winning is that important to you people, OK, but it just doesn’t seem like as much fun.
At first I’m thinking: TJ, TJ… no need to do some sort of sick double-reverse psychology. Your team’s winning, as a team, without LO to boot. Isn’t that the most exciting part of all? Buut, then, as I was eating a cake in Kwame’s honor, I thought about this a bit more.
Simers makes an understanding point: the most lethal scorer of our new era is now subdued. Watching him play just isn’t the same, adrenaline wise. Sure MJ in his later years did the same, by pacing himself in individual games (as well as the season—wouldn’t it be great if we can all have that type of telescopic vision?) so that he maximizes the effort in order to get the Dubya.
Don’t get me wrong, right now, I’m enjoying how Kobe is doing Nash-esque type things (even some of his passes resemble Stevey a bit, dribbling and looking up) But I think by him doing this, he’s lost some venom that we all love and hate.
Okay, so tonight (well, in an hour…) Phoenix gets their hack at extending another streak… vs. GilZero. The only thing that’s more exciting than Arenas’ ascension this season has been the constant joy the emanates from the Suns… choosing side tonight is like choosing whether to flip a fan off or not.. let’s get the battle royale goin’ with two superb blogs: Rising Suns and BulletsForever
And I thought about this exact thing at the time as well, where that missing game of Denver should give the Suns one of those happy asterisks (as opposed to those sad and pathetic ones for baseball folks) that they were gipped a crazy winning streak. But Nasty, the eva deep one:
“It’s amazing,” he said. “But it’s not a championship.”
Steven Nash, wordsmith.
Oh yea, be sure to read the off-the-charts-SuperSaiyan-level-4 type of sarcasm by “joe” in the comment of that article.. and I thought I was a smartass..
Sure, I haven’t really mentioned the patron saint of us online hoop heads—Archbishop Agent Zero, here at the HQ for a second, reason: I friggin mentioned the hell outta him over at BulletsForever just a couple days ago!
Howeva, that doesn’t excuse the fact that I’ve been slacking here, so I give you The Unrelatedness‘ good friend Dan Steinberg (who has been a saint himself for dealing with my 10 thousand emails, love ya Dan!), clueing us in on Gilbert Arenas’ jersey sale climb in the top 10 (full admission: the post links back to us…. yea.. I’m a linkwhore )
In your first game against Toronto, those guys were making a serious run at you. And you guys were in the huddle during the timeout laughing and smiling. What’s that all about?
TB: You just have to be somewhat loose in pressure situations. If you’re not loose in pressure situations and you are tight, you can’t perform. So I try to keep loose in those situations and not get bogged down in nine-thousand different little details, but make it pretty simple as what we have to do. Toronto took the lead and they were looking over at me because they thought we were going to take a time out and we didn’t. We pushed the ball and (Mike Miller) hit a three. That was as good as anything I could have said during the timeout. That’s the way I look at it.
It’s interesting because they seem to have just DEMOLISHED the 5th place LA Lakers with seven players in double figures! With just E. Jones scoreless on the active roster. A big Doube-U Tee Eff? I think it’s that loose-ness they’re playing with, since they’re the worst team in the lig and really just having fun out there and really don’t give frak. They’re the type team right now that other teams hate to play against. LakerBlog breaks the game down while Beale Street Beat says Barone’s good coaching aint no fluke.
Something something about Jason Kidd‘s personal life—eh… I’ll just say this: hopefully TJ’s head will dissolve back to normal size as it doesn’t need to deal with his crazy ‘rents being together anymore. Oh and Joumana, call me! We’ll play chess or something, I’m wild too!
This may be my least contributable (not a word, I know) post to the NBA blogworld, but whoever that may stumble upon TheUnrelatedness should immediately read WizzNutzz’s dissection of Etan Thomas’ plight. Simply amazing, it makes me want to read more books.
Great way to start a Saturday huh, with just a smidget of cartoon-y violence. I don’t get “The Wire” up here, but I imagine that’s exactly how things would’ve gone down.
The New/Old Ball-pocalypse may or not really be a done deal, so that leaves us with another anti-climatic cliffhanger until the full resolution comes next season. Get new writers Stern! But hopefully the above installment will be the last ep in the string of | various | appearances | around here. |
Of course, it’s no Orange Roundie..
The Allen Iverson Purgatory Watch: Day 9, but it feels like Year 9. T-Dot scrambled the phone lines to tell the world they have 3 Mil to throw into this
clusterfu rotisserie of a trade.
Suns extend their winning streak to number One-Three! They’re so hot right now, Jack McCallum’s book is spontaneously combusting in bookstores everywhere!
Yao Ming brought out the Peking Duck, called his friends (NOT inviting McGrady though, understandable) for a Block Party! He got a career high 8 blocks with 6 of them in the first half alone. Not wanting to be outdone, Dikembe Mutombo remembered, “oh shit, I can do that too!” and added 3 of his own. Per usual, Deke waved his finger, injuring 12 courtside attendees, 3 in critical condition.
Then the Rockets blew a 21 pt lead but Yao’s 8th block (well, goaltend) was crucial since they were down 2 with sixty on the crickety. OT: Kobe vs. Yao, both had chance to shoot to win. Draw. DoubleOT: Rockets missed everything, Kobe made everything. Lakers win. Kobe 53-10-8. Yao’s 35-15-4 and the aforementioned 8 blocks looks so, so sad.
However, Ben Wallace scoffs at both those un-American chumps by Kirby-ing his career high 27 boards. That’s just one shy of the entire Bucks’ defensive rebounds. Twenty effin’ Seven!
Pau Gasol played last night for the first time since the summer. Stat line: 4pts in 17mins… and they lost. Grizzlies: no no no no no! You want to tank the season AND save your franchise guy, c’mon! Greg Oden is rolling in his grave.
And the Wizards finally beat the Heat after 3 and half years of being hexed. Or sucked. Possibly both.
Quick thought, they should start a site called GrizzNutzz… ehh? ehh? Okay, maybe not.
Btw, me done with them exam thinys. Huzzah!
First the quick hits:
BulletsFever is dead. Long live BulletsForever! SB Nation is a great fit for the Pradamaster, congrats.
New Carnival of the Month with enough links to fill Santa’s gift bag.
Got a kind email letting me know of Brett Edwards’ post about that wacky Ronny Turiaf and his waaaacky antics:
It’s clear what’s going on here: Ronny is addicted to rosin powder—he’s a RosinPowderolic… so, so sad.
And what’s the best thing to do after coming out of an exam room? Do a radio show with buddies!