NBA TOONS: Alonzo Mourning Is Pumped


I’m pretty sure if any normal person does Zo’s constant “pump fist at every single play because life is too short” dance we’d be called an ass first and foremost. But because Alonzo Mourning has a new lease in life and playing at high intensity sport, he gets a pass… or not. He’s still an ass though. Imagine this guy playing checkers at 73 with his grandkids and on the verge of winning, he flips the board and flexes and does that twirl on the floor giggle..

UPDATE with quotes!

”I don’t want him to come back,” Johnson said. “Retire, you won it all, go with your family, take your wife around the world.

ESPN analyst Stephen A. Smith, who emceed Saturday’s gala, disagreed, saying Mourning would have the perfect situation with the Heat since guard Dwyane Wade is in his prime and Shaquille O’Neal still is viable.

I mean, if Magic tells you to quit, don’t you feel obliged? Then again, you have Stephen saying a subtle: “NOOOOOOOOOO!!!” Who knows what influenced Zo.

Zo: I will stay for another season [Miami Herald]


  1. hey hype guy! thanks for the comment… love your site! basketball is my fav.. the twolves are my team unfortunately. next year should be playoff-bound, but it’s only a matter of time before kg goes postal and either shoots the entire team or goes off somewhere with a decent gm.

    i noticed you don’t have bill simmons’ espn column linked on your site, do you read it? he’s my idol. one of the funniest writers ever.

    anyhoo, i’m sure you’ve seen this already, but if not, check out the 720 dunk:

  2. Yeah, that dunk is still making me dizzy (hmm..gave me an idea for a new “TOON”) And as for The Sports Guy’s column, I use to read it heavily, but then got more and more traumatizing to navigate that I forgot all about him.. buuut, I guess theHypeGuy isn’t too good for theSportsGuy, I’ll linky him up post-haste!

    KG is busy meditating in the far East so at least he’s got zen working for him.

    Your site rocks Cap’n Oats! Beside being a baller addict, I’m a big tv addict, and your takes on the shows are awesome, especially with the good music sharing!

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